so I just heard about Article 13 and I’m so pissed. why why WHY ARE THEY TRYING TO DO THINGS LIKE THIS! THEY’RE DOING ALL OF THIS BUT NO ONE WANTS TO EVEN HAVE STRICTER GUN LAWS I JUST DONT UNDERSTAND. WHY WHY WHYY ARE THEY SO FOCUSED ON THE INTERNET AND REGULATING EVERYTHING WHEN THERE ARE LIKE 200+ THINGS THAT NEED TO BE FIXED THAT ARE WAY WAYWAY MORE IMPORTANT.
Its cause we have corrupt and stupid people in the government who only care about controlling people..and not actually governing as they should…the government is like that everywhere
If Venom is so much of a loser back home, how did they end up on this highly important mission? What possible purpose would they serve? Riot is the leader, of course, and I’m assuming Carrion (yellow) and Blight (blue) would probably be like combat and study, so why is this dumb gay there?
And then it hit me.
The only constructs Venom ever produced during fights were defensive. When the Foundation goons bust up Eddie’s apartment, they make a shield to protect the people whose window they just crashed through from getting shot. The fight with Riot, they produce a big one to keep him from tearing their face off. After the rocket, they created a parachute so Eddie didn’t get hurt—at what could easily have been the cost of their own life. They told Anne not to get involved because it would be dangerous.
Venom was just a tank. The only reason they were there was to take damage and keep the others safe.
Fuck, man.
…and of COURSE the team protector would be the one to look at this planets sweaty inferior meatbags and go ‘but consider: what if I protect THIS, actually’
Have I watched the movie in the last decade or more? No. Do I have iron clad evidence to support my argument? Yes.
1. She’s the most knowledgeable about candy. She’s committed to it, and knows her stuff. When Wonka holds up a little yellow piece across the room, she recognizes it immediately. She was able to switch to candy bars for the sake of the contest, so we know she has personal discipline and is goal oriented. Also, two major projects play directly into her strong suits: the 3-course-meal gum that Wonka failed to make safe (gum) and the neverending gobstopper (longevity).
2. She’s the most fit to run a business. Violet is competitive, determined, hard working, and willing to take risks. Her father is a small town car salesman and politician, so she could easily pick up knowledge and support from him. (Veruca’s dad is also a business man, and in a compatible market (nuts), but it’s made very clear that Veruca has no respect or knowledge of business practices or hard work.)
3. She’s the most sympathetic to the Oompa Loompas. She critiques Veruca when Veruca demands to buy one. More importantly, Wonka has been testing the 3-course-meal gum that ‘always goes wrong’ on Oompa Loompas while he presumably just watches. Violet is ready to put herself on the front line, instead of treating the Oompa Loompas as disposable, and would therefore be a better boss.
4. Her personality ‘flaw’ is the most fitting for the company. In the moralizing Oompa Loompa song, they just say ‘gum is pretty cool, but it’s not socially acceptable to chew it all day‘. The thing is, we already know that she can stop if she wants, because she already did that to win the golden ticket. And yeah, she is defensive about the perceived impoliteness of her hobby (like when her mother tries to shame her about her habit during a televised interview) but the obsession with candy and neglect of social norms is EXACTLY what Wonka is all about. This is on brand.
5. Her misstep in the factory is reasonable. Wonka shows everyone a candy he’s very proud of. Violet is like “oh sick, that’s gum, my special interest.” Wonka is then pulls a “WRONG! It’s amazing gum!” So in the very moments before she takes the gum Wonka has mislead her just to belittle her. So when he’s like “I wouldn’t do that” why should she give a shit what he has to say? She’s not like Charlie over here who’s all “Sure Gramps, let’s stay behind while the tour leaves and secretly drink this thing that has been explicitly stated to fill you with gas and is too powerful for safe consumption, oh and also I just saw what happened to Violet so I actually KNOW what this stuff can be capable of” Also, Violet is not selfish about her experience, she tells everyone what she’s tasting and feeling, and everyone is eager to hear it. Taking a personal risk to share knowledge with everyone. Violet is Prometheus: fact.
So Augustus contaminates the chocolate river. Charlie sneaks around and contaminates the vent walls. Veruca destroys and disrupts the workspace. Mike knows exactly what will happen to him and transports/shrinks himself deliberately. Violet had no idea what the gum could potentially do to her, and caused no harm to anyone or anything but herself.
Lastly: Can you imagine Charlie filling Wonka’s shoes? That passive, naive boy? Violet is already basically Wonka. She’s passionate, sarcastic, candy-obsessed, free thinking, and a total firecracker. She’s even better than Wonka, because she doesn’t endanger others.
Violet should’ve been picked to inherit the chocolate factory.
When I was sixteen, my family visited Hawaii, and I had a cute new swimsuit. I was a pretty busty teen, with the vocabulary of an AP English student, and while I was out swimming, a couple of college guys started flirting with me. Nothing gross, just pleasantly casual hey-you-look-great-how-are-you-enjoying-the-beach stuff.
After a minute or two of this, one of them asked if I was there with friends, and I said no, I was with my family. “Wow, you still travel with your family?” one exclaimed. “That’s cool…”
“Well, I am sixteen,” sez me.
Reader, they blanched. They flustered, they apologized, they assured me that they’d thought I was also in college, they wished me a good vacation and they bounced. All within about a minute of realizing they’d been chatting up a minor.
I was mildly mortified at the time, but now? I look back and think, Ah, what good men. What good young men.
The moment we saw the cardboard disk in the “physical copies” should’ve been a red flag
oh dear
Waitholup, there were WHAT in the disk cases??
You know, for a minute there I thought Blizzard had conducted this year’s greatest video-game cock-up. Then Bethesda said “Hold my Nuka Cola” and started a dumpster fire.
Cadet-For-Your-SpaceRescue 