glumshoe:

wolfebain:

glumshoe:

I know people make jokes about being oblivious to flirting, but you really can’t overstate how bad I am at picking up on signs. I dated someone on accident once because I didn’t notice he had romantic intentions by inviting me out to get ice cream until he was holding my hand and asking if I was ready to go steady (I did not understand what that meant, but I said yes out of curiosity). My first kiss was a complete surprise because I didn’t realize that her compliments and touches were meant to be flirtatious until her lips were on mine. My friends have dragged me away from people in bars because I was so eager to make cheerful smalltalk about NASA that I didn’t figure out a drunk stranger touching my hair was trying to seduce me. I once interpreted long, unbroken eye contact as aggression and braved myself for a violent fistfight with a classmate, only for him to kiss me on the lips.

Hate to be the one to tell you this but that’s a literal symptom of psychopathy

Not that I am a guidance counselor, but I would strongly advise you not to make “armchair psychologist” your day job.