do you have any advice for a fellow very sad human

agentquinn:

yes actually 

take care of yourself 

make sure that you eat even if you don’t have an appetite. take a shower. do your laundry. wrap yourself in blankets. take yourself outside for a walk. make that phone call. read that book. talk to your friend. take yourself out of your own mind. 

don’t sit there and stare at the wall. don’t do it. 

make an online post, watch videos of cute animals, draw a picture. do your dishes while listening to music. read two pages for your exam. finish that assignment. but don’t lie in your bed as the minutes creep by. 

i mean, sometimes you will, but try not to. take care of yourself. 

here’s an online self-care guide you can do. 

see someone about it 

this is not possible for everyone and i understand if it’s not possible for you. and maybe you don’t need it! maybe things aren’t so bad! but maybe you’ve been kind of sad for a really long time now, and it might be a good idea to at least check with someone. 

maybe you’ve been just really tired. or weirdly irritated. maybe you don’t get hungry anymore. maybe you don’t sleep, or you sleep too much. it really, really doesn’t hurt to talk to someone, just in case. if you can.

it was really hard for me to even make an appointment. i cried. my doctor was running late and i sat almost half an hour in an empty cold hospital waiting to talk to him. i nearly cried talking to the doctor, too. it was very embarrassing. i’m telling you so you’ll know you probably won’t be as embarrassing. 

take your time. start by telling a friend or a parent about you being very sad. do it in text if you can’t say it out loud – i told my friend in facebook chat. go from there. 

nobody else can really figure out why you’re so sad 

they can help you figure it out, obviously. therapists can be great at this, i’m told. (i’ll get to one one day) 

you can also do your own soul-searching. what kind of situations seem to make things worse? are there things or people in your life that seem to make you sad? sometimes we can spiral into sadness from perceived rejection, sometimes it can be the fear of failure and sometimes you can just be in such a shitty situation that every day is a struggle. (note: i’m only talking about what i’ve perceived, this is not official Mental Health Facts) 

anyway, sometimes figuring out what makes you tick can help you find coping mechanisms. you probably won’t find any easy fixes, i’m afraid, but you might figure out to ask your loved one to tell you that they love you when your brain is screaming at you and you just need another person’s reassurance that you’re worth something.  

your brain is a liar, sometimes 

sure, it’s your brain. those are your emotions. they aren’t any less valid even if your brain is hell-bent on keeping you sad. but it’s a tricksy bastard who likes skewing up the perspective. keep tabs on things that make you happy too. don’t take it on face-value when your mind says you performed awfully. don’t believe it when you seem to think everyone secretly hates you. (at worst, they’re just ambivalent, which really isn’t so bad) 

i know, i know this is difficult, i’m cringing as i’m writing this because when i’m really sad, everything good seems to slip through my fingers and every kind word feels like it’s secretly mocking me. sometimes i can only cling onto one, maybe two good things in my life i feel like i can trust, but when that happens, hold onto them tight. think about sunrise, or next year, or that good thing. (they love you even if you put your cold feet against their warm ones) 

no matter what happens or whatever you are, or whatever you do or don’t do, you’re worth something. unconditionally. 

more good things will come.